I look from the window, and what do I see?

I look from the window, and what do I see?
I see a familiar face, trodding the lane
I see some smile, I see some pain
I see people as busy as can be.

I look from the window, and what do I see?
I sense a long lost mystery in the air
I see some pleasure, I see a tear
And much more, I try to see

I look from my window, and what do I see?
I see women lost in household chores,
I see men lost in soccer scores,
Lust I see, passion I see

I look from my window, and what do I see?
I see the old mount far away,
I see the pines, the hamlets at sway:
Something I really want to see!

I look from my window, and what do I see?
I see a bird fighting the breeze
I see a battalion planning a siege
A lost voyager at sea

I look from my window, and what do I see?
I see a nervous student going for tests
A kid walking to the school he detests
An old man with a stick I see

I look from my window, and what do I see?
The curtain blocks my vision, and nothing I see.

Would he reach ?

They say when one wants something
With all the heart and soul

The whole universe conspires

to fulfill the longing desires

As the sunlight filtered through the trees

With the buzz of the humming bees

As the clouds aligned in artistic precision

all inculcated in him a sense of elation

The signs were showing directions again

it was time to achieve the aim

whether the sky, the wind or the cloud

'go for it' they were shouting aloud

As he looked up to the heavens

He had to reach, no matter what

Up there, to the peak glistening in the sun

Because now, there was nowhere to run

His fingers grab the nearest ledge

A knee presses on a hard rock

The foot leaves the ground finally

His fingers pulling him entirely

Some more distance from the ground below

he waits and breathes a sigh

for years he had cherished that faraway peak

He always knew what he had to seek

Finally today he had started

He looked down one last time

To everyone , he always had one thing to say

He would reach the mount one day

Some more steps, some more bruises

But deep inside, an undefined pleasure

A smile crossed his eyes every time

Thinking of the day he'd say, "Its mine".

A little kid when he was, he dreamed

Of fairies and dreamlands afar,

How his granny always cherished Robinhood's spark
How persistently he fought against the dark

And he knew one day he would ride his horse

And rescue the princess from the curse

Ha! today he knew there was nobody else

Today he would climb just for himself.

But he suddenly trembles, and hits

A rock gives away under his foot

For a moment, his toes nearly slip

He jumped with all his valour to skip

This moment filled him with shock and surprise

Scary it was, with feelings undetermined

His journey, his relatives, all his life

Everything flashed as if it was tip of knife

What followed was a long pause

Leading to uncountable revelations

He valued just his target

But alas! The same he did forget

Father's strength, mother's care,

Brother's quarrels, sister's prayer

The girl for whom he left everything behind

Revered emotions rushed through his mind.

He realized how some always helped

How some always took care of his needs

Supported him through thin and thick

Helped him lay every underpinning brick

Could he leave all this behind, forget he has to pay?!

He could turn back, he could climb down

He could fill every place with affection

Maybe craft a glistening reflection !

But alas! If he returned

all supportive efforts, all encouraging words

all prayers for his success will go in vain

he cant give the dear ones such a pain

he changes his mind instantaneously

he will stay and accomplish his mission

not for himself, but for those

whose hearts have always stayed very close

So, he walked ,walked many a mile

He passed men and women, lost in their lives

He left many a bleeding lands of war

He saw gardens of love and roads going far

The summer passed, the rains came

Rest did he take in between ?

But he couldn't fail, he knew

He couldn't fall after all he has been through!

Living the mammoth time expanse

Climbing the gigantic height of the crag

alas! Finally he reached the pinnacle

triumphing over the mighty debacle

He stood right there, stood staring !

Clouds, and blue mounts, birds and old pines

Villages and fields and the phantom skies ..

Oceans and winds so alive !

Again it was father's strength, mother's care,

Brother's quarrels, sister's prayer

The girl for whom he left everything behind

Bruised emotions rushed through his mind

He had won! And he bowed to the world entire

The universe did conspire to fulfill his desire!

And as the last ray of sunlight shone through a tree

He turned back, to the place he wanna be

The first sight

It was all white, and a blinding light,
And a faint darkness that I could sense,
Faint sounds sometimes reverberating through me
And a divine warmth which I could not see.

I still couldn't open my eyes but I
Wobbled and moved and turned
Only to find that my world was small:
Every time I reached out, I thumped against a wall.

Then one day I found the world had gone smaller !
Or maybe I had grown by that time,
My neck was craned and I had to relieve the pain:
I stroke with my beak in disdain.

And as if someone was listening for me
I heard two crashes beside my head
With a little hope and more of fear:
The wall was breaking, I thought I could hear !

A moment later, a sharp pain seared
Across my head, down to my limbs
As my chest rose and filled to the end
Ah! It was my first breath, my friend !

And I don't know how it happened
I opened what I felt were my eyes
And the streak of light hurt but I continued to stare
I saw two expectant eyes: my mother was there !

And it was so much a joy: I never felt again;
The egg broke away as I strove to be free:
There was so much in this world for me to see
There was so much in this world for me to see

A story.

A long time, a long time back
Before everyone was so true,
Before people could do anything
For ones they didn't even know.

Before the sky seemed endless pleasure
Before the clouds smiled, it seemed
Before the sun beamed rays of hope
Before the ocean dreamed:

A lost traveller, unaware he was lost
Believed the world was small
Thought he knew his destiny
Believed he knew it all.

But soon, a new book he opened
Couldn't believe he was wrong
Had never thought of something so good,
Had never heard so beautiful a song.

And he fell in love with the new world
More than a smile every step that lay
He knew he was a foreigner here
Thought he would change and wanted to stay.

So, he 'told' that he wanted to stay forever
And spend his days sharing what he had seen
Happened what he feared to percieve
His new world asked him to leave.

He may have foreseen this, but was surprised
Why couldn't he make the world realise?
That his love was more than anything he had seen
He wanted to stay, that's all he could mean !

But the world did not accept him,
Said its rules, he did not follow
That he didn't belong to this place
But any 'other' world would be glad to see his face!

The world explained that he could live
But it will never be his home
That he could live in this world for a while
But never make it his own.

He had resolved he'd never go back
All through his life, he would live here
He couldn't go back, he couldn't walk on
Too determined not to let out a tear.

But out of the blue sky, a little bird flew
Atop his shoulder, by his side
Fluttered its wings that could heal
And told him what he could never feel.

It spoke of love that could never end
It talked of people he could never offend
Told him about the better of things
Explained some lost meanings

Asked him how long he took
to express His longing to stay
If he took so long, how could the world
Accept him in a single day ?

And after all, the world needed time
To realize something that was new
The little bird whispered in his ear
"Not everyone's lucky as you".

The traveller took the bird in his hand
In its eyes was a longing he couldn't understand
But it didn't matter, because early or late,
Just like the little bird, he too would wait.

Wind.

Far away, it has touched the hills,
Played with clouds, pushed them away,
Straining the trees, bending them over,
Inviting them to dance, and sway.

A bird once forced to its little down the nest,
Till it would fly, she wouldn't come to rest,
Down went the little baby, its heart thumping hard,
In despair it was trying its best.

A little flutter, but the ground still came near,
A mount of will, that too so new,
And soon the wind saw this and smiled,
Took it in its arms, and the baby flew ! ....

(still a draft)

A glimpse of Nature

written on 24/Dec/07

Up he climbs the chair, up the window
Stained glass just shimmers in brightness,
Except a soft, cold breeze caressing his eyelids,
'From the window left ajar.

He wants to reach out, open the window
But is unsure how to begin
The streak of dazzling daylight,
And the calm air it's bringing in.

Far away, a bird returns to its nest,
Feeding its little, it cries out of joy !
This cry reaches him, and with a smile,
Throws open the window, this little boy.

His eyes widen, lips part
As the morning sun fills his face;
The warmth on his face, cools his heart,
As everything seems to hide in a misty haze !

He sees far away, a mount :
Draped in a purple cloud,
And a hill of pine, unusually white,
A mountain falcon, crying out loud.

He reaches his palms, out through the bars,
Far as he can, untill
An unsure, white snowflake comes to land
Atop his skinny hand.

A moment or two, the flake is gone
While two more have landed beside his finger
But the sunlight, dancing in the clouds
Melts them, doesn't let them linger !

Now, a distant wind takes over
And his eyelids come to quiver,
When suddenly, his mother pulls him back :
"Don't open windows, I told you dear !"

Her Smile . .

Speaking for itself, yet mysterious
Hiding something, yet revealing
Deliberate, but small
Her smile reveals it all !

Natural but constrained
Spontaneous , yet maintained
With an intention so definite,
Yet some secrets retained.

Supported by warmth in her eyes:
Lowered by culture and social ties,
Her smile is where God resides
This is a place on earth with no lies !

For a moment of happiness, a moment of praise,
For the memory of a happy day
It is shouting aloud, can you hear
What much her smile can say ?

It speaks of the happiest moments of her life,
Of eventful days and lonely nights
Of dreams which never came true
Of regrets, though few.

But her smile also tells the way
She fought with difficulties that lay:
The overshadows she had to bear,
The cheap words she had to hear.

But she stood unbroken and carried on
With that particular smile on her face
Teasing you, irritating you, so that her smile ..
Is reflected on your face !


about this poem

Left everything unspoken.....

Written on17 apr 2007,

Oh, I remember my first day in school,
Sat beside a girl in a yellow dress;
Was nervous when her lunch she offered,
Was shy when her water bottle I had to fill,
The elephant she drew looked terminally ill:
But I left my taunt unspoken
Couldn’t leave her heart broken..


Time flew, we grew
Friends as we were , laughed and cried,
Did pranks, then apologised,
I loved her more than friends, more than myself:
But I left everything unspoken
Couldn’t leave her heart broken..


To admire beauty, she was the sight
Somone asked her out on the prom night
I drank the whole night
I wanted to be with her anyhow
And murder that rascal somehow
But I left everything unspoken
Couldn’t leave her heart broken..


She got a job in a financial firm,
I, a history buff, in a museum
We exchanged emails with formal greetings
Sometimes with memories of earlier meetings
I wanted to type those words,Wanted to tell her my feelings
But I left everything unspoken
Couldn’t leave her heart broken..


And then one day, I got a mail
The wind was no more a gale
I opened the envelope in hesitation
What fell down was her ‘Wedding Invitation’
And a tear dropped at the fold
Where her name was etched in gold;
Why did I leave everything unspoken ?
Lest her heart be broken.. !


But I buried everything within myself
Killed my feelings , poisoned my heart
I might go senile, but wanted her to smile
I may not give her happiness she deserves
With someone else, let her spend the while
And so I left everything unspoken
How could I leave her heart broken.. ?
—–
Forty years had passed , the wounds healed
The morning paper was, as ever, uncharming
When I saw a name, I had once despised
The headline told about his wife’s demise !
I retraced the name, with hesitation :
Forty years back, on the ‘Wedding invitation ‘.


And after a few telephone calls, I rushed
To a graveyard, where a gathering was hushed
They had already buried my dear,
Under a majestic pear;


When they walked back,
I sighedI leaned on the grave and . . . . . . cried.
The name etched on marble looked divine,
Instead of her’s, wish it were mine.
I could see her wearing that yellow dress
Memories were gripping at my heart
That elephant she drew, ha! it was a mess
Nostalgia was ripping me apart ..


Beside the grave, was a neat pile of books
They had belonged to her, by the looks !
This would be their last destination
I picked a diary with hesitation
And began to read . . . . .


—————————————————————-
(the first page read…)

“My first day in school went happier than it should
Sat beside a nervous boy, but he was good:
He filled my friend’s bottle, thought it was mine !
And drew an elephant as fat as he could !
But I left everything unspoken
Couldn’t leave his heart broken.. "


(I quickly turned the pages)

“I wish he’d ask me out
The prom night is closing in
Going out with him, I can’t resist
But I think he doesn’t know I exist !
Maybe he asked someone else..
So I would leave everything unspoken . .
His heart wouldn’t be broken. "


(some notes later)
“Today is my wedding, wish you would come
And speak up, if you love me, don’t stay mum
Or maybe you love someone, I don’t know
How lucky she is, she doesn’t know
If this is my fate, let it be so..
Just be happy wherever you go:
And I’d leave everything unspoken..
My dear, your heart won’t be broken.”


(and then, on the last page . .)

My doctor says I have two months of life
I’m not afraid, but I am sad
Where are you, I don’t know
Told you everything, wish I had..
Because soon I will be no more
About to open is my last door
But this diary would remain even after me
Maybe, someday, in your hands, it will be…….

*****************************************************************

The Tear from her Left Eye.....

about this poem

A woman on a stretcher, amidst some rushing doctors,
I sense horror in their mind,
The surgical room closes, concealing everything
But a few relatives left behind !

I know nothing of her disease or ailment
But something is bad, i sigh;
As she was being hurried into the ward,
I had seen a tear in her left eye.

Beside the door, a group of enstranged people
some crying, some trembling in fear
Hesitatingly, i walk to one, take a deep breath:
"what's wrong with her, can you tell me dear ?
This heart in me is praying for you
Your agony I want to hear,
He may test you some times,but trust me,
God is near !"

"her child is dying within her ! ",shouts she
You say God is near?
Even her last dream has been shattered
I tremble at the pain she has to bear
I have lost faith in you and your God
Or in any saint or seer
You might shout to the world
'God is near', 'God is near'
If this is all God can do:
God's presence , I Fear !

The fifth time we are standing here
Inside my sister's under the knife
The fifth time we are all meeting
For an end of a life.

The fifth time , the child in her
Has suddenly stopped breathing
The fifth time, a little heart
Has stopped beating."

Every word of anguish uttered by her
Kept weakening me from within
I wanted to hug her and take all her pain
But was unsure how to begin.

Truth can be so stranger than fiction
Dark truths are not always few
Her every word was frightening
Yet, every word was True..

She adds,"three months of anticipation,
Of buying toys and a teddy bear
Thinking of 'Maa',from its tender lips
The first word mother waits to hear

My sister had selected a name too !
And knitted tiny sweaters for cold
Gave a broad smile everytime it moved
Had even got a walker for it to hold."

And she breaks away in many a tear
Anything more, even i can't hear
I look down with blurred vision
Controlling my tears: i failed in this mission.

And a drop of salty water falls..
From my eye, onto the floor
With a saddened heart i keep staring
At the surgical room door.

Time elapses, the door opens
She's brought out with care
I look at her unfocused eyes and see
Every emotion left Bare

And then my heart stops beating
I give a deep sigh
Because i see the same single tear
Beside her left eye ...


About this Poem